


I can't stop bleeding here

by JoeBros147



Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cuddles, F/M, Fluff, Friendship/Love, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Mention of alcohol, Requited Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-24
Updated: 2015-08-24
Packaged: 2018-04-17 02:49:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4649358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JoeBros147/pseuds/JoeBros147
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU: set after Brendon's car accident - he was driving and killed a small kid. He can't get over that fact, so he decided to leave.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I can't stop bleeding here

**Author's Note:**

> Basically this is my first fic published EVER so please be nice.  
> Also I couldn't find a beta, so if you see anything wrong, tell me. <3
> 
> Title inspired from Opposite by Biffy Clyro

"I am leaving for a few days" stated Brendon while packing his stuff. "Don't try contacting me. I'm leaving my phone here and I will not leave you my address" he added.  
"Don't go, please..." Samantha whispered quietly. She felt sick. Brendon and her had been friends for what felt like ages and yet he was acting irresponsibly and in the way she'd never expect him to. Brendon looked the small girl deep in the eyes. She looked up and lost herself in his hazel eyes for a brief moment as well.  
"You can't do anything about it Sam" he told her and closed his suitcase. "See ya" he added, hugging her tightly. Samantha sniffed loudly as the tears started running down her cheeks.  
"Hey... Don't cry" said Brendon, slowly wiping her tears up with his thumbs. "I'll be only gone for a few days." He smiled softly as he spoke "You won't even notice I'm not here." Samantha's clenched her fists. Of course she would notice he was missing. He was one of her friends, the most important one even. Well, at least for her. She didn't think other people would actually notice he was gone. Sam's gaze went to her feet. She knew most of Brendon's so called friends kept with him mostly because of his angelic voice and amazing abilities to speak. Guys used it to get girls and girls either followed him blankly or asked him to sing for them, which was stupid in every case. Her eyes went back to Brendon's face.  
"You don't have to go..." She tried once more but Brendon cut her quickly by hugging her again.  
"Yes, Sammy, I do. It won't be that bad, I promise." He muffled into her neck. With that he let her go, turned around, grabbed his bag and left Samantha in the middle of the room alone with her thoughts. "What if something happens to him? What if he gets lost? What if someone attacks him? No, I need to be calm, he's gonna be okay!" Sam thought to herself. With that she sighed deeply and left the room.

Because Brendon never left her any information about where he was heading, she decided to investigate on her own. It took her a week and a half to locate him. It turned out he wasn't that far away, only a few kilometres away, in some reach people's mansion, which owners left for holiday and would be gone for next month or so. Sam asked her friend who lived nearby for some information about who’s taking care of the house, in which hours there’s people in there or when does the caretaker leaver. She was very determined of at least trying to talk to Brendon, since she missed him greatly. Her friend turned out to be really helpful. He told her that a guy named Jason Creek is taking care of the mansion, and that she’s a friend of his as well. He also told her that Jason is willing to take people on tour around the mansion for 20 bucks per person, which she surely would agree to. Saturday came fast and Samantha decided it was the day she would get Brendon back.

She was riding on her bike down the road to the mansion, which could be easily spotted from the distance. It was slightly yellow on the outside, surrounded by a high fence and a gigantic gate in the front. She approached the gate and rang the bell.  
“Who’s there?” the voice in the other side asked. “It has to be that Jason guy…” Sam thought to herself.  
“Uh.. hi, it’s Samantha. We talked a few days back. I was to see the mansion today, remember?” She said out loud.  
“Ah, yes, Sammy! I remember. Please, come in!” With that the gate opened slowly and Sam went inside. She was going though the garden, which was one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen. When she finally got to the door, Jason opened them for her.  
“Welcome to the Creek’s mansion” He said jokingly, bowing down to her. She chuckled and went inside.  
“Whoa… it’s so beautiful in here!” She nearly shouted.  
“Well, yes it sure is!” Agreed Jason with a smile. “We’re just waiting for two other people and we’re ready to go sightseeing.” He added after a second. Sam’s heart stopped for a brief moment. If they’re going to see the mansion with someone else, she would never talk to Brendon alone.  
“Hey Jason…?” She started, but at the same time the bell rang and the boy went to let people in. When he came back, he was accompanied by a small girl and her father. The kid looked around in awe, so did her father, but Samantha wasn’t that happy. She only wanted to talk to her friend. She frowned. “How am I supposed to do anything now…” She thought and followed Jason and the rest of the people to the room, as they had already started the tour. When Jason wasn’t busy talking about the mansion, he did a thousand other things, like dusting things off or making sure everything was in place. He didn’t own the mansion after all. After about 40 minutes in, Samantha approached him.  
“Hey Jason… here’s a thing. I love the mansion and all, but I came here for a reason.” She said quickly. Jason gave her a confused look. “Do you… Do you know where’s Brendon?” She blurted, looking at her feet. “I know you do…” Sam nearly whispered.  
“Why are you asking anyway?” Jason said cautiously, staring at her.  
“He’s my best friend and I worry about him. Besides, he never left me any information about where he was going or for how long. I was scared, you know…?” she said bluntly, slowly looking up at the boy. He must have seen something in her eyes, because his sight softened.  
“Okay, I’ll take you to him.” He stated after thinking for a while. Samantha smiled broadly and hugged Jason tightly. "You might not like what you'll see..." He added in a husky voice.  
“You have to promise me something then.” She added quickly. Jason looked at her confused. “Promise me you won’t take these two to him or his room. Him and I really have to talk and I don’t want anyone wandering around and listening to us, okay?” Sam sounded determined. She really wanted to talk to Brendon alone, without any witnesses, since she’s most likely to cry and get very emotional over the fact, that she finally sees him. She clenched her fists and stared at Jason. “Promise?”  
“I’ll see what I can do” he finally answered. Samantha smiled again and couldn’t get the smile off of her face, even when the rest of the group approached them and they left to the elevator located in the main hall.

They exited the elevator and Jason said loudly “Sammy, there’s the bathroom you asked for. Go there while me and the others go into the other room. Take your time.” He smiled and winked with the last words and hurried away, the two guests following. Sam slowly opened the door to see a shirtless figure lying on the bed. She entered the room, and quietly closed the door, hoping the man laying there would be Brendon. She approached him quietly, sat on the bed and nearly gasped in shock. He looked bad – uncombed hair (which he looked attractive in anyway), thin – definitely lost weight. He surely drank a lot of beer lately because she saw empty bottles near the bed. Sam looked at him, lying there, only wanting to hug him. Suddenly Brendon moaned loudly and opened his eyes. As soon as he noticed the girl, he nearly fell off the bed.  
“Samantha?! What are hell you doing here?!” he said under his breath, in a demanding tone. She looked him deep in the eye and as soon as she realized he was actually in front of her, she started crying loudly.  
“Oh my god, Brendon, I thought I would never see you again.” She cried out, hugging her arms tightly.  
“Hey, hey, I’m okay, see?” Brendon spoke quietly, hugging her and rubbing her back slowly with his palm. “You didn’t need to worry, Sam. I said I would be back, I just didn’t feel like coming yet, but I would never, ever leave you!” He said, bringing her chin up with his fingers so she would look at him. Her gaze wandered off though.  
“You’re not okay Brendon…” she stated. “How much had you drunk lately, hmm? Five, six beers daily? How could you do this to yourself?” She added reproachfully. ” “How could you do this to me?” She added in her thoughts, not daring to say this out loud.  
“I’m okay, I promise Sammy” he said, looking away.  
“Someone wise once told me, that sometimes before it gets better, the darkness gets bigger. You have to remember that, you know? Keep it in your heart and never, not once forget about these words. Well, at least I never did.” Sam looked at Brendon closely. She saw all shades of emotions appearing on his face as he looked at her again – from pain, through hate and resignation, to lust and, was it something else she saw? She didn’t know anymore because suddenly Brendon was leaning in for a kiss, something she dreamed of for years. She never actually thought it would happen, because she wasn’t even that pretty or smart, besides Brendon had many of more beautiful friends and lots of girls trying to get his affection but, as far as Sam knew, he never did any move towards anyone, or if he did, it was just flirtation or a wink here or there – never anything serious. Brendon’s lips were inches away from hers now. Their gazes locked and he planted a soft kiss onto her lips. His lips were really soft, a bit cracked because of dryness, but kissing him was still an extremely pleasant experience, one of the very best she’d ever lived. He shifted back to look at her and smiled brightly.  
“I’ve wanted to do that for quite a long time..” he said with a shy smile. Samantha smiled back, leaning in for another kiss. Suddenly the door swung open, little kid and her father entering the room. They view they saw clearly wasn’t what they were expecting, because father’s face went to apologetic look in seconds and kid’s changed to disgust but also curiosity. The father started to apologise quickly for invading their personal space, but the girl, as the kids are normally, didn’t mind the awkwardness of the situation, because she asked right away.  
“We were looking for the bathroom, but it’s clearly not.” The little girl stated sassily. “Are you Brendon Urie? The singer…?” the girl squinted her eyes as if she was wondering about something and neither Brendon nor Samantha knew what to do in that kind of situation.  
“I.. Uh.. Yes I am, why are you asking?” Brendon answered.  
“No reason.” She shrugged and jumped forward to the bed, hugging the shirtless man. Brendon didn’t know how to react, so he just hugged her back. “I’ll keep an eye on you, you know? Be good.” The little girl added thoughtfully, leaving her father, Sam and Brendon speechless.  
“I’m so sorry about her…” The father mumbled and rushed the girl out of the room, him following. After the door had closed, Samantha and Brendon looked at themselves and started laughing.  
“Well, that was terrific and hilarious at the same time.” Sammy said after a while, catching her breath and wiping a stray tear from her eye. “Let’s never do that again. I would never survive that girl’s looking at me again” She added after a second and smiled at Brendon.  
“Hah, yeah…” Brendon said in a sad voice.  
“Oh, I didn’t mean THAT, Beebo!” She said before kissing him firmly on the lips.  
“Beebo, hmm..?” Brendon said, tilting his head and rising one eyebrow.  
“You don’t like it..?” Sam saddened quickly. “It’s okay if you don’t…”  
“No, Sammy. Quite the opposite.” He smiled and hugged her.  
“Can we go home now?” She quietly mumbled into his neck.  
“Yes.” He answered, taking her hands into his, planting a kiss on her forehead and pulling her even closer.. She breathed in his smell and sighed in happiness. It was all she needed right then.


End file.
